Brene Brown on Why to Stop Being A Blamer

Friday, January 15, 2016

Brene Brown in a sunlit office

I love Brene Brown. She always hits the nail right on the head, EVERY SINGLE TIME. When I was younger, throughout most of my twenties, I had a serious problem. I didn't exercise control over my own life, and often felt like everything was crazy. I blamed everyone else for the problems in my life. My relationships sucked because my boyfriends were dumb, mean, insensitive, blah, blah, blah, blah, blaaaaaaaah. This same thing would happen about bad friends, bad jobs, and any other situation I was in.

It was never MY fault. 

One day, I realized the common denominator of all of my situations that sucked was, actually, ME. Sure, things can happen that aren't within our control, but let's be honest here, most of the stuff that happened to me wasn't that. In fact, most of those situations were few and far between. I was allowing annoying, toxic, or frustrating people and situations into my life on a regular basis and then complaining that they were there being what they were! What happened once I figured this out? My life got a lot less annoying and frustrating. 

Check out this short little animated film set to one of Brene Brown's talks. Her advice explains perfectly why blaming is pointless.

My favorite talking point of hers? Blame has an inverse relationship with control. (Also, DAMN YOU STEVE.)

+++ Watch the video and let me know what you think!


[Photo Credit]


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11 comments

  1. Thanks for sharing! I've struggled with the same problem! I just recently discovered Brene and she has provided a lot of wonderful insight! Thanks for posting this!

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    1. She really does. I'm just recently discovering her too.

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  2. Great information! The video explained it so well! I will definitely be sharing!

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  3. This is a great self reflection. I have brenes book I thought it was just me and I really need to start digging into it

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    1. I have just been watching her TED talks but definitely will look into the book.

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  4. Awesome! I have never heard of her but this is great. Sharing for sure!

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    1. You should look up her TED talks, they are INCREDIBLE.

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  5. This is SO true! It took me until I was mid 20 to figure it out. But, man once I did my life really made a huge turn towards happiness. I try to tell my kids but it is a hard thing for them to comprehend. I liked the video too

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    1. You and me both! I was such a crazy person before I started to get this whole idea of me being in control. I bet your kids will pick up on it the older they get. It seems more of a thing that happens once you are an adult.

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  6. I couldn't agree with this post more!

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